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James Graham's Rayman Pan Part 4
Here is part four of James Graham's sixth movie spoof, Rayman Pan. Cast * Rayman (from Rayman) as Peter Pan * Coco Bandicoot (from Crash Bandicoot) as Wendy Darling * Duck (from Thomas and Friends) as John Darling * Stanley (from Thomas and Friends) as Michael Darling * Cream (from Sonic X) Tinker Bell * Admiral Razorbeard (from Rayman) as Captain Hook * Admiral Razorbeard's Lackey (from Rayman) as Mr. Smee * Neptuna (from Croc) as Tick-Tock the Crocodile * The Lost Boys played by: * Double Dee (from Ed, Edd, 'n' Eddy) as Slightly * Courage (from Courage the Cowardly Dog) as Nibs * Asterix and Obelix (from Asterix) as The Twins * Eddy (from Ed, Edd, 'n' Eddy) as Cubby * Ed (from Ed, Edd, 'n' Eddy) as Tootles * Ly the Fairy (from Rayman) as Tiger Lily * Officer Dibble (from Top Cat) as Indian Chief * Sagwa Miao (from Sagwa the Siamese Chinese Cat) as Nana * Didi Pickles (from Rugrats) as Mary Darling * Stu Pickles (from Rugrats) as George Darling * Banzai, Ed, Jasper, Horace, Sal Left Thumb, Henchman 800, Hunchman 1000, Cannon Boat Keith, Amos Slade, and The Goons (from The Lion King, 101 Dalmatians, Rayman, Croc, The Fox and the Hound, and Sleeping Beauty) as Captain Hook's Crew For Following The Leader Crossover, Inspired By NickyHelp's Video *AiAi as Adult Kovu *MeeMee as Adult Kiara *Tom as Rafiki *The Elephants (Goliath II) as The Army *Han Solo as Donald Duck *The Asterix Characters as The Mulan Characters *The Cartoon Network Characters as The Lion King 2 Characters *The Disney Characters as The Rankin Bass Characters *The Army as The Marching Men *Adult Bambi, Adult Thumper, and Adult Flower as Simba, Timon, and Pumbaa *Mario, Luigi, and Yoshi as Donald Duck's Nephews *The Parade (Dumbo) as The Parade (Robin Hood) *The Cavalcade as The Elephants *The Stormtroopers as The Pelicans *The Video Game Characters as The Jungle Cubs *Aladdin, Genie, and Abu as The Three Stooges *The Dragons (Spyro) as The Alice in Wonderland Characters *The Nickelodeon Characters as The Disney Parade *Mad Jack as Jerry *Snuk as Nibbles *The Audience as The Sing Along Characters Transcript *(In Neverland, there is a pirate ship filled with predators. Some of them are setting up a flag of the Jolly Roger, some of them are throwing daggers at a crude drawing of Captain Admiral Razorbeard himself) *Banzai, Ed, Jasper, Horace, Sal Left Thumb, Henchman 800, Hunchman 1000, Cannon Boat Keith, Amos Slade, and the Goons: Oh, a pirate's life is a wonderful life, A-rovin' over the sea, Give me a career as a buccaneer, Near a life of a pirate for me. Oh, a life of a pirate for me! Oh, a pirate's life is a wonderful life, They never bury your bones, For when its all over, A jolly sea rover drops in on his friend Davy Jones Oh! *(Just then a lackey, Admiral Razorbeard's spyglass pirate, comes out of out of a door, and is carrying a tray of stuff you would find in a barber's shop.) *Lackey: (singing with the predators) My good friend, Davy Jones. (stops singing and chuckles) Good morning, shipmates. *Banzai: (grabs Mr. Lackey) And what's good about it, Mr. Lackey? *Ed: (points his claws toward Lackey's stomach as Ed laughs) Here we are, collecting barnacles on this miserable island. *Jasper: (with Mr. Lackey's beak in his pistol) While his nibs plays ring-around-the-rosie with Skunk Pan. *Lackey: Look out there! Might go off! (pulls his beak out of the gun, only to get his neck stuck in a rope.) *Horace: We ought to be tending to the business of looting ships. *Cannon Boat Keith: (uses his red lightsaber to cut the rope and free Bushroot's neck) Well, we almost forgot how to slit the throat. *Amos Slade: Better drop it! (the pirates throw daggers at Lackey, who avoids him) And tell the captain we want to put to sea, Lackey! (the pirates laugh, before Lackey sticks his tongue out at them, gives them a sly nod, and walks away. At the told of the deck, Admiral Razorbeard, who is the master of all the pirates, and with a fake stoogie in his mouth, looks at his map) *Admiral Razorbeard: Blast that Rayman Pan! If I can only find his hideout, I'll trap him in his lair! But where is it? Mermaid Lagoon? No, we've searched that. We've combed Cannibal Cove. (puts his silver hook toward the village of the Indians) Here! No. No, no, no! That's the Indians Village. (stops soon) But wait! Those royals know this island better than I do me own ship. Ah, I wonder... *Lackey: (chuckling) Good morning, captain. *Admiral Razorbeard: I've got it! (grabs Lackey with his hook) Ly the Fairy, Lackey! *Lackey: (stammers) Fox, captain? *Admiral Razorbeard: Officer Dibble's pet feline. She'll know where Rayman is hiding. *Lackey: (stutters again, as Razorbeard lets go) But, will she talk, Captain? *Admiral Razorbeard: Oh, one little persuasion might be in order. Now let me see, boiling in oil! Uh, keelhauling! Marooning! (But suddenly, he heard someone singing. He looks up and saw an obese elephant seal named Stromboli singing a pirate's song an his accordion, only not to sing well.) *Stromboli: Oh, a pirate's life is a wonderful life! You'll find adventure and sport, But live every minute, For all that is in it! The life of a pirate is short! Oh, the life--- (Razorbeard takes out his gun and pulls his trigger, shooting Stromboli, leaving an alarmed Lackey to jump, when he hears the gunshot. Stromboli and the accordion splash into the sea. Lackey takes a good look, only to get splashed in the face.) *Admiral Razorbeard: (blows smoke from his gun and puts it away) Now, let me see; where was I? *Lackey: Oh dear, dear, dear, Captain! Shooting a man in the middle of his cadenza? It ain't good form, you know? *Admiral Razorbeard: Good form, Lackey? (knocks the table over angrily, and then storms toward Lackey, shaking his hook in front of him) BLAST GOOD FORM! DID RAYMAN SHOW GOOD FORM WHEN HE DID THIS TO ME??!!! *Lackey: Why, captain! Cutting your hand off was only a childish prank, you might say. *Admiral Razorbeard: Aye, but throwing it to Neptuna! That cursed beast has liked the taste of me so well, he's followed me ever since, licking his chops for the rest of me! *Lackey: (sits his master in the chair) And he had you by now captain, if he hadn't swallowed that alarm clock. But now, when he's about, he warns you, as might say with his tick-tock, tick-tock! (a tick-tocking noise is heard. As Lackey's ears hear the nose, Razorbeard's eyes blink in rythym. As some bubbles are swimming toward the ship, Neptuna, a sea creature, appears out of the water and licks his lips, ready to eat) *Admiral Razorbeard: Lackey. Lackey! Oh, save me, Lackey! Don't let him get me! Save me, Lackey! Don't let him get me. Save me. Lackey. Lackey. *Lackey: (walks toward Neptuna) Here, now. Shame on you, upsetting the poor captain. There'll be no handouts today. Shoo, now, shoo! Go on, go on, go on! Off with ya, I say! Go away! Go on, out of here! (As Neptuna begs like a dog, he knows that Lackey means it, so he swims back to alligator creek. Razorbeard peeks out from behind a sheet on the chair) *Admiral Razorbeard: (scared) Is he gone, Lackey? *Lackey: Aye, captain, all clear! Nothing to worry about. *Admiral Razorbeard: (climbs into Lackey's arms and shudders) Oh, Lackey. Lackey. I can't stand it any longer. I tell you, I can't. (falls in the chair while Lackey sets the sheet on top of his torso.) *Lackey: Now, now, now, captain. Just relax. What you need is a shave-- a nice soothing shave. There now. (as Lackey puts a towel around Razorbeard's head, the captain sighs in relief. Meanwhile, a bird, named Chip, flies by, sees the towel, and when he thinks it's a nest, he sits on the towel that is wrapped around Razorbeard's head, before he falls asleep. Lackey starts singing) Oh, ho ho! A pirate's life is a wonderful life, A-sailing over the seas, Give me a career as buc-- (Lackey stops singing as Chip puts some shaving cream on his rear end.) Captain, you know, I can't help noticing you just ain't been your usual jolly self lately. (singing) Give me a career as a buccaneer, (not singing as he picks up a razor and wipes it on a towel) And the crew's getting mighty uneasy, captain. That is, what's left of it. (chuckles and shaves Chip's feathers off of his bottom) Now, why don't we put to sea, see? (puts some aftershave on his hands and rubs them together) Leave Neverland. Forget Rayman Pan. (putting the aftershave on Silas's bottom) There, now! (Chip wakes up and sees that his tail feathers have been shaved off, until he realizes and flies away, covering his behind while squawking in horror) (singing) Give me a career as a buccaneer (not singing) We'll all be a lot happier. Not to mention a lot healthier. (puts some powder on his hands and puts them out, only to realize that he is doing it in mid-air) Oooooohhhhhhh!!!!! (sees that Razorbeard's head is nowhere to be seen) Captain? Where are you? Oh dear. I've never shaved him this close before. (stammers) Now, don't worry, Captain. It must around here somewhere. (begins to walk off with the chair on top of him. The towel falls from Razorbeard's face. Razorbeard looks down to see that Lackey is making a fool of himself by crawling to find Razorbeard's head) *Admiral Razorbeard: (furious) GET UP, YOU IDIOT! *Lackey: (obeys and knocks the chair and Razor to one side of the ship) Aye-aye, sir. (turns around to see Razor dazed.) Oh! I found it, captain. Good as new. (chuckles to himself as he tries to pull his head off, only for Razorbeard to get angry and grab Lackey by his neck.) *Admiral Razorbeard WHY, YOU BLITHERING BLOCKHEAD! *Banzai: Rayman Pan, ahoy! *Admiral Razorbeard: What? Where away? *Ed: Three points off the starboard bow! *Admiral Razorbeard: (looks through his telescope and seeing Rayman, Coco, Duck, and Stanley arrive at Neverland) Swoggle me eyes, it is him. Heading this way with some more of those scurvy brats. Lackey, pipe up the crew! *Lackey: Aye-aye, sir. Pipe up the crew, pipe up the crew. All hands on deck. All hands on deck! All hands on deck! (blows his whistle and runs all around and stompis the deck) All hands on deck! (The pirates enter the deck) *Admiral Razorbeard: Look alive, you swabs! We got him this time, Lackey. *Lackey: That we have, captain. *Admiral Razorbeard: (to the pirates) Man the Long Tom, you bilge rats! (puts on Admiral Razorbeard's clothing and hat) I've waited years for this. *Lackey: That's not counting holidays, either. *Admiral Razorbeard: Double the powder and shorten the fuse. *BLackey: (as the two pirates get the cannon ready) Double the powder and shorten the fuse. *Lackey: A pretty sight, Lackey; we'll part them like sitting ducks. All right, men! Range forty-two! *Lackey: Range forty-two! *Admiral Razorbeard: Elevation sixty-five! *Lackey: Elevation sixty-five! *Admiral Razorbeard: Three degrees west! *Bushroot/Mr. Smee: Three degrees west! *Admiral Razorbeard: Steady now! Steady! (This time, Lackey doesn't repeat; and, instead, covers his ears) *Coco Bandicoot: Oh, Rayman, it's just what I dreamed it would be. Oh, look, Duck. There's Mermaid Lagoon! *Duck: By jove! And the Indians! *Stanley: Oh, look! There's Captain Gutt the pirate! (a moment later, a cannonball fires) *Rayman: Guys, watch out! (hides Coco, Stanley, and Duck in the clouds and ducks as the cannonball flies over them. Quick, Cream. Take Coco and the boys to the island. I'll stay here and draw Razorbeard's fire. (as Cream obeys and atkes Coco, Stanley, and Duck to the island, Rayman whistles to Razor and the pirates) Yo, Razor! Razor, you codfish! Here! Over here! (more cannonballs fire, but miss when Rayman dodges them, and screams in fear when he falls down, but saves himself by flying. Meanwhile, Coco, Duck, and Stanley, still flying, sees that Cream is flying too fast) *Coco Bandicoot: Wait, Cream. Not so fast, please. Please, Cream. We can't keep up with you. (Cream doesn't hear and flees) Cream! Wait! (Cream goes inside the Lost Boys' tree to see Courage, Asterix, Obelix, Ed, Edd, and Eddy asleep, and wakes them up, and when they see her) *Courage: What's the orders, Scratte? *Eddy: A terrible what? *Double Dee: Coco bird. *Eddy: Coco bird? *Double Dee: Flying this way? *Eddy: Pan's orders are...what? Smash it? *Double Dee: Kick it? *Asterix and Obelix: Stomp, stomp it? *Double Dee: Oh, shoot it down! (He and the boys grab their weapons) Quick! Follow Cream! *All Characters: Yeah, follow Cream! (They follow Cream outside, seeing fish in the tree and see Coco flying in the sky and landing neatly on the ground) *Coco Bandicoot: So this must be the Island. (Cream, again, gets angry and glows red, knowing that her plan does not work, so he flies through a dandelion. Duck and Stanley arrive alongside her) Hang on a minute. I hear voices. *Double Dee: (in Napoleon's voice and blows his trumpet as he Courage, Eddy Asterix, Obelix, and Ed yell and charge toward Coco, Duck, and Stanley, who hide behind their umbrella that Duck carries, Rayman, standing in front of them, takes out and turns his light blue lightsaber on, causing them to stop and gasp in horror with their hands up) *Rayman: Halt! (his lightsaber's glowing blade makes a Hum 2 sound) Attention! (the kids obey, and as they bow down, Rayman switches his lightsaber off) Well, I'm certainly proud of you. I've brought you a mother to tell you a story. *Asterix, Obelix, Courage, Ed, Edd, and Eddy: A mother?! Hooray! *Rayman: Cream?! Cream! (Cream comes out from behind the leaf) Come here. You're charged with high treason. Are you guilty or not guilty? (Cream yawns a bit, which indicates to Rayman that she is guilty) Guilty? Don't you know you might have killed her? *Cream: Yes. *Rayman: And when will you get over it? *Cream: (walks away) I'm ashamed of myself. *Rayman: You'll get over it. Come on, Coco. I'll show you the island. *Coco Bandicoot: Oh, Rayman, can we see the mermaids? *Rayman: Sure. Duck, you are the leader. *Duck: I shall try to be worthy of my post. Forward, march! (starts off as the characters him through the forest) *Stanley: (takes his teddy bear with him) Come on, Teddy. *Coco Bandicoot: Oh, Max, do be careful! *Rayman: (takes Coco's hand) Come on, Coco. I'll show you the mermaids. (as they fly off toward the Mermaid Lagoon, the characters march through the jungle searching for some Indians, and sing as they go through a waterfall) *Characters: (singing) Following the leader The leader, the leader We're following the leader Wherever he may go (leap onto some stepping stones across a stream. Duck gets to the other side first. Eddy trips and holds onto another stepping stone as the characters walk across. Eddy gets up after that and follows them. Stanley leaps on the last stepping stone and jumps to the side, unaware that he is standing on Dexter, who, while being a hippopotamous, looks up. They sing) Tee dum, tee dee A teedle ee do tee day Tee dum, tee dee It's part of the game we play Tee dum, tee dee The words are easy to say Just a teedle ee dum A teedle ee do tee day (the characters cross a vine while more slide down another to catch up with them) Tee dum, tee dee A teedle ee do tee day We're one for all And all of us out for fun We march in line' And follow the other one With a teedle ee do a teedle ee do tee dum (whistle a tune of some monkeys trying Duck's hat and giving it back to them while they cross the savannah) Following the leader The leader, the leader We're following the leader Wherever he may go (Next, Stanley is climbing up on a rock and stands on it to see where Duck and the gang are going.) We're off to fight the Injuns The Injuns, The Injuns We're of to fight the Injuns Because he told us so (Stanley slides down the rock, which turns into a football player, which is a rhinoceros, until he catches up with them. As they walk through the now-clear forest, Duck leads the group past a sleeping bear named Bear. Duck pokes Bear's nose with the umbrella point. Bear just wakes up and is about to attack them. Then Stanley walks past him with his teddy bear over his shoulders. Bear looks confused) 'Tee dum, tee dee A teedle ee do tee day We march along And these are the words we say Tee dum, tee dee A teedle deedle dee day Oh, a teedle ee dum a teedle ee do tee day Oh, a teedle ee dum a teddle ee do tee day (as soon as the song ends, a shadow spots them with two eyes looking at them) *Duck: Indians! (examining some footprints in the sand with a picture of a triforce on it) Ah! Indian tracks! (The heroes make a base of sand around themselves to attack the Indians) Belongs to the Freedom Fighters. Quite savage, you know. *Eddy: Let's go get them! *Characters: Yeah, we'll go get them! *Duck: Gentlemen! Gentlemen! First, we must plan our strategy. *Eddy: What does a strategy mean? *Duck: It's plan to attack. (Stanley sniffs at the footprints while Duck uses his umbrella to draw a circle around the footprints.) The initial phase is an encircling maneuver. (Meanwhile, Duck sees a feather on the ground, and just bends over to pick it up when an axe comes over his head. He picks it up and pretends to dance like an Indian. Then he notices that something is wrong. A bush is following him. As he tiptoes at first, the bush does the same. He runs and then turns to face him. The bush stops by him. Stanley looks under the bush to see the feet of some kind of guy dressed in Indian garb. He gulps and runs to warn Duck and the animals are in a huddle) *Stanley: Help! Indians! Indians! (hits Eddy with his bear) Let me in! (Eddy accidentally kicks him out, and sees that there are hundreds of bushes surrounding them.) *Duck: Now remember, (unaware that the bushes are surrounding them) The Mobian is cunning, but not intelligent. (The same bush that was following Max sneaks up to him, and two arms that of that same Mobian come out of the bush and grab him.) *Stanley: Hey! (as he gets pulled into the bush and drops the bear, the same hand of the Indian pulls the the bear into the bush) *Duck: Therefore, we simply surround them and take them by surprise. (A struggle ensues with the heroes trying to escape the bushes that were obviously the Indians in disguise! The Eds frantically run out of a tree, but are pulled in. As Asterix and Obelix climb up a tree, an Indian chops it down. Courage runs around the clearing, trying to evade the Indian that is chasing after him, but ends up being caught by the Indian, who grabs him by his blue collar with yellow nametag and blue lead attached to it, flings him around, and sends him flying right into the shrubbery to be captured with the others. Lots of Indians are taking the poor boys to the Indian Village and have tied them up) *Duck: I'm frightfully sorry, old chaps. It's all my fault. *Eddy: Aw, that's all right, wildcat. *Double Dee: No, we don't mind. *Asterix: That's okay. (Then a shadow falls over them. It's Officer Dibble, the leader of the Indians tribe) *Officer Dibble: How! *Everyone: How, Dibble! How! *Stanley: How! *Officer Dibble: For many moons, the Indians, the fight pale-faced lost boys. (The heroes stammer) Sometimes, you win. Sometimes, we win. *Eddy: Okay, Your Majesty. You win this time. Now turn us loose. *Duck: Turn us loose? You mean this is only a game? *Double Dee: Sure. When we win, we turn them loose. *Asterix: When they win, they turn us loose. *Obelix: Turn us loose. *Officer Dibble: This time, no turning loose. *Heroes: Huh? *Double Dee: (chuckling nervously) Officer Dibble's a great kidder. *Officer Dibble: No, I'm not kidding! Now where is she?! What have you done to Princess Ly the Fairy?! And why have you taken her? *Eddy: Princess Ly the Fairy? (laughs) *Double Dee: What?! What's so funny, Eddy? *Eddy: Princess Ly the Fairy. She's Rayman's girlfriend. *Double Dee: (angrily) We ain't got one of your own sister! (Ed, Eddy, Courage, and Duck laugh with delight) *Duck: (still laughing) I've certainly never seen her. *Eddy: (still laughing) Me neither. *Asterix: Honestly, we don't. (Duck, Ed, Eddy, and Courage continue to laugh with delight) *Officer Dibble: (Dr. Robotnik's Voice) SILENCE! (the boys gasp) This isn't funny. And if you think it is, I'll tell you this. You're telling lies. And I'm warning you. If Ly isn't back by sunset, we'll burn you down. (the boys gulp) Category:James Graham Category:Peter Pan Movie Spoofs Category:James Graham's Transcripts Category:Peter Pan Parts